Award show craze

So everyone is talking about the Oscars today. Yes I watched them. Just like all you out there that are denying you watched but did secretly. I know who you are.

I watch Award Shows in general. Just like most all women. I watch for the dresses. I admit it. I love to see what the latest trend is. Who looks like a knock-out in that latest designer and who needs to be knocked-out.  

I imagine what I would wear should I have an invitation to walk any red carpet. Of course I have 5 feet of legs and weigh 100 pounds dripping wet. Not to mention that a top designer is a close personal friend and I have $1,000,000 worth of jewels hanging from various body parts.

I imagine a that I would wear a princess dress just like something a starlet wore last night. Then I see another beautiful star walk down the carpet and I imagine the one shoulder number with the side slit in gold shimmery material. A truly stunning number that one. Then it's a Hold-the-presses time as that sleeveless ivory exquisite and dreamy dress (do I even dare call it just a dress) comes down the ruby red carpet hanging on that A List star. Not to mention those designer shoes and handbag to match. Does that A list star even deserve to wear such a creation as this. NO. But I do.

I walk down the carpet and smile at all the people and give innumerable interviews to the media and I stand there in MY dress with all the flashbulbs going off. Smiling knowing that I am the most honored woman there. 

Then the most aweful thing happens. Yep, you guessed it. I wake up. Just in time to see the real stars walk the carpet. <sigh>  Someday.